Friday, January 4

Twitching and convulsing

I don't really want to buy a new car. I would just love if we hadn't broken the one we have. Now, we know what kind of replacement we want, we know how much we can afford to pay monthly for it. This is where complication sets in. The amount and year of the car are such that they prevent us from the kind of loan we can afford which is a five year loan, we can only get a three year loan which would make our monthly payments way too high. Not to mention, because the car we have is unsafe, (driving it around town makes me want to convulse) driving to where the cars we want to look at (two hours away), is out of the question. So because we can't get to the cars we want to look at in our handicap car, we will have to pray we can get half way there to a city where we can rent a car then drive the other half in the rental. This kind of stress makes my eyes twitch. This is where a family comes in handy. "Dad you are driving me two hours away so I can buy a car, why you say? BECAUSE YOU ARE MY DAD"!

Thursday, January 3


I stepped out for the mail this morning. The cold took my breath away.

My little one loves to eat the snow, she cries when I shut the back door without letting her grab a handful.

Wednesday, January 2

Labor Anxiety

When I was pregnant with Claralynne, the day of her birth was a welcome exciting anticipation. I thought of holding her, seeing her for the first time, I didn't spend much time contemplating labor and delivery. I understood it would be the hardest thing I had ever done. I had no expectations, no real anticipations, no way to prepare. When the day rolled around, I labored 18 hours, from 12 noon September 19to 8 a.m. September 20. I had gotten next to no sleep the night before and labored all the next night. Words like hard, painful, exhausting, difficult, so understate the experience there should be new words invented to better define it. Those words were my only preparation for labor back then, it is no wonder wasn't affraid. Ignorance was definatley bliss.

This time around, there is still no way to prepare. Knowing now what I didn't know then, aids me no better than being completely in the dark. If anything it makes trying to prepare harder, I can't unknow labor, I can't forget it, I can't deny it, I am just stuck with it, the ultimate fear factor. I have flashbacks, dreams (not really nightmares but not far from it) all things to remind me of the day. I know there is no escape, I just have to do it. In short, I have some anxiety. I would love someone to do it for me. Or I would love to be in that blissful state of unaware. The only things I have to aid me are knowledge and pride. Knowledge that I have done it before, and pride that I was able to accomplish the most difficult task I have ever been given. When it is all done my little family will have this new perfect person in our lives, the best of Nathan and I all over again, I can't say that doesn't help just a little too!

Tuesday, January 1


I got this off of Kateka's blog and thought, "I should do that too"! So here is the year 2007 in review for me.

Funnest Event:
Spending a month with my family in Colorado, Heather and Whitney finally got to meet Clara!

Biggest purchase of 2007:
Our new King size bed. Best purchase of the year too!

Favorite movie of 2007:
Harry Potter O.O.P
I am Legend

Least favorite movie of 2007:
I am going to say Spiderman 3 like Kateka did, even though I did not see it! I hate all Spiderman movies, this year I spared myself and didn't see my least favorite movie, YAY FOR ME!

Favorite celebrity for 2007:
Adam Sandler, I was so happy to see him step out of his comedy comfort zone an perform such a strong, bold and moving role in "Reign Over Me".

Least favorite celebrity:
I am so tired of the Jennifer Aniston BOO HOO! I have always disliked her. Get over it he found a better woman!

Guilty Pleasure:
Always chocolate

Saddest moment of 2007:
When Clara choked.

Sickest moment of 2007:
Morning sickness, and the sinus infection I am still fighting!

Favorite song of 2007:
1234, Feist
Stars, The Weapies

Least favorite song of 2007:
Usually if I don't like a song I don't make an effort to know what the name of it is as I usually change the channel, but there is a song about not going to rehab by some girl with no vocal talent, I change that song more promptly than most others.

Biggest event: In chronological order,
Nate graduated from A school and became a Petty Officer AT LAST!
Moved across the country for the second time.
Got pregnant again.
Claralynne turned one.

Surviving morning sickness.
Being a Mom for a whole year!
being married for 3 years!

Lessons Learned:
Take deep breaths, and try not to "sweat the small stuff".
Put oil in your car...or it dies and you have to by a new one :(

In 1 word 2007 was:

In 1 word 2008 will be:

My hopes for next year:
I have a healthy baby
Nathan becomes a Petty officer 2nd class.
My daughter continues to grow, thrive, and be amazingly beautiful.

Thanks for this Kateka!

To the few of you who read my blog, copy and paste this! I want to see how your year was!